I haven't always been this way.

Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you.

I hate you.

You are such a piece of shit.

You are so undeserving of love.

Going to smoke a shit load of weed so that I can fall asleep and forget about you. Well, for at least the next ten hours, asshole.

I wish I had a boyfriend who gave a fuck about me.

This shit is getting old. How hard is it to be nice a decent human being? I’d love to be taken on a date, maybe out to eat every once in a while. I can’t remember the last time we did something together. Can we do something that involves just us, but not fucking Via. It’s funny how you can go there like every night but can only see me twice a week. And that’s only whenever I ask to come over. All those nights you go party with your friends, but you’ve never came to visit me on a Friday night, why? I mean we’ve been together for over two years. Can’t you ever surprise me with a visit? Walk outside with me? Take me out to eat? Stay at my house later than usual? Ask me to spend the night? Do something romantic. I mean jeez, you’re fucking leaving in August! It’s not like we have much time left. I’d love to see you more than twice a week and for longer than a few hours. Stop talking to her. It makes me fucking sick, literally. I can’t stand it. If you don’t want to then I’ll gladly rip both yours and her throat out. Mainly hers. You’ve made me cry again, just like always. I’m sad and hurt. You never seem to care. All the times I cry at your house, you act like they never happen. I’m tired of you ignoring and forgetting me. Especially since I’m always here when you want to talk or hang out. Never when I need you. You don’t understand how angry I am, I can’t help it. I’m angry at everything. I hate everything and everyone. You’ve made me this way. You used to tell me that you’d be there to listen whenever I needed to talk, then you stopped caring. Every time I tell you how I feel  now all you do is get angry and yell at me. That helps a lot. Obviously now is the time i need you most. I’m going through hell here. I just want to be happy. You always say you can’t make me happy. Why the hell not?! It’s so simple! There’s a reason why i fell in love with you the boy you used to be. I tell you all the time, just be nice! but you never listen! I just want you to listen to me, do nice things for me, pay attention to me. As much as you’re ready to leave, I just want you to pretend that you want to stay here with me forever. I know you don’t but please just pretend for two more months, that I’m the most important thing to you. It may be selfish of me to say that, but so was your decision to leave me behind like I never meant a damn thing to you. Stop ignoring me. Stop blowing me off. Prove to me that I have a good reason to wait around for the next 4 years. I’m willing to wait for you for the next four years, so am i really asking too much from you for the next 2 months? You probably won’t ever see/read this. But god, I really just want the old Drew back. The guy who used to write me poems, like the one hanging on my wall right now. The guy who used to call me every night. You haven’t called me in over a year, other than the times you were drunk. I miss those texts that you’d send me in the middle of the night explaining why you loved me. Waking up to one of those was the greatest feeling in the world. Now I feel like I’m lucky to ever get a text from you. I want everything to go back to how it was. I really miss you. And at one point I know you gave a lot of fucks about me. I wish it was still that way. Happy two years and one month, handsome.